December 2024

December, the final month of this year and deep winter. I find it beautiful to document and mark time, experience, learnings, growth in our lives.

I write this from (one of) the most peaceful moments this year, a book end to how I spend last winter. Sitting by a fire and praying for transformation in my life, which I can certainly speak to. Hobonichi is a new friend that gives me structure.

I have to say, work has been more intense that I would have liked but I also have gotten into a good rhythm and relationship with it and everyone that I feels so easy as well and I can still fill my time with other things.

I was getting used to living in NYC, first a week about by myself, then about a week with Bosco. I went back to the dentist. I went to the dog parks, got used to having him there and it was like a test run. His itching was much better and I was only nervous he would miss Saki and be depressed because he was sleeping a lot.

I saw Linden a few times and took many walks, got sushi, framed my photo for too much than I should have, then I got picked up by Dad in the van and went back to Roslyn for the dentist, and then had surgery - bone graft- to put bone into my mouth. Now I have stitches and taking antibiotics, not my favorite because it kills everything in my stomach and I feel bloated, and I’m just relaxing in wilton now and eating and chilling and have to study for this YPP test.

Affirmations:

I am powerful

I am confident

I am free

I am whole

I am fulfilled

I am thoughtful

I am thankful for every lessons

I am grateful for my life

I am radiating my energy

I shine my inner light

I am the ruler of my life

I am creating the best life for myself

I create and share good energy with others

I am worthy

I am full of myself and my own energy

I call all my power and energy back to me now.

New moon on 1st Dec on my MC at 9 Sagg. There was also the dialogue program I did in early December at work, Had dinner with SG spokesperson which was a highlight because I love him he’s so funny. and then how I was upset that Klemen went to Argentina and saw somebody else and I felt betrayed although before that I supposes you could say I pushed him away and told him I wasn’t interested in anything serious or with him.

I set up an altar space in my apartment to my guides, and I’ve been calling my energy back and asking for their support to clear blocks and open new doors. To help me see things I haven’t seen. To help me make my most free and authentic life in NYC a reality.

Being intentional about routines. The Saturn discipline I can see, it’s like a mssage, like If you simply don’t do things the way it should be then it will not feel as good. Like the hard work of creating structure actually feels better, even though it initially takes more resistance and a push to get there, there is much more reward and things flow smoother I find. I feel living in a studio now, this lesson which I haven’t been fully embracing is giving me no other option and I think it really is my responsibility now to do the things i’ve been blocking myself from doing for other reasons that simply are no longer there, like the commute.

I’ve also felt lonely at times and find it hard to cook really good things for myself. Like these muscles I haven’t used in a long time and the anxieties around leaving Bosco in there and having him bark, not sleeping so well but better and getting more used to it. It’s all going well, small steps and trusting that I am creating the best life and the best routines.